User blog:Chewiki/The Very Manly Diary of Austin Northrop: Chapter I

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Greetings. My name is Austin Nathaniel Northrop III. You, however, may call me Austin.

I was born in the shadow (literally, shadow) of a student you may, and probably, know: Russel Northrop. He is my first cousin, zero times removed. We're a bit different, as you can see. He's big, I'm small. He beats up Nerds, I hang out with Nerds. He's dumb, I'M smart. NOTHING alike at all.

But, that didn't stop us from liking each other. Russel is so. . . interesting. He seems to feel the same way about me, though in a different way.

After my parents died in some freak car accident, (which I developed motorphobia from) Russel's parents took me in. We went to the same school, Bullworth Public Schools. I got straight A's, Russel got straight B's and C's (thanks to me) before he got expelled in the eight grade. Russel's parents sent him to Bullworth Academy. Unfortunatly, he kept on getting in trouble for bullying (which I hear makes a GREAT video game), so Russel's parents begged me to switch schools and try to control him. I was reluctant at first, but I decided that I would rather have to switch schools than to have Russel expelled, again.

So, as I jumped out of Russul's parents' topless car, I took a look a Bullworth Academy. It didn't look too bad, very luxurious, in fact. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. I look back on that thought as the only time I was ever stupid.